Christmas Came Late For My Wife’s Family

January 14, 2010

  

Time to spill more family secrets.  This time it is my wife’s family.  The topic of this post was kind of suggested by her.  I thought her and her family might be off-limits (click here to see why) but apparently not.

This is not some Queerbait¹ story about a family being on hard times and having to delay christmas so they could scavenge the dumpsters of local apartment complexes after christmas to check for other people castoffs until some guardian angel brings them presents.  My wife’s family was not Low Rent or Creekers.

Anyway – The first time I met my wife was the day after Christmas in 1978.  I had been working at the clothing store “Chess King” at the mall, I wasn’t cool enough or a hot female so I couldn’t get a job at  “Merry Go Round” and had just gotten off work and picked up a friend to go out to “the beach” (future blog post) to hang out and take part in underage drinking and other Dazed and Confused type activities.

My friend and I were parked hanging out and this COOL ’73 Firebird Formula pulled up alongside us in the adjacent parking spot. I was told “That’s Ross’s girlfriend, let’s go hang out in her car”.  Ross (fake name) had been my best friend since 7th grade but for some reason we weren’t hanging out together much at that time so I had never met his girlfriend.  I think he might have dropped out of school at the time and been working wierd hours or something.

We get in the car and first thing I am told is “I just got my ears pierced” by my future wife.  Which was a coincidence since she had just had it done at the “Merle Norman” at the mall just across from where I was working at “Chess King”.  She explained that her mother was old-fashioned and she had to wait until she was 18 to get it done because her mother felt “ONLY WHORES HAVE PIERCED EARS”.  This was one of those items that later became known as a “Francisism”  which was crazy things my mother in- law named Francis said. If you are doing math – yes I was underage, she was 18, so my wife is older than me.

We then reviewed what everyone had gotten for Christmas.  Her haul included – A new 8-track stereo for her car including Jensen Tri-Axial Speakers with a Power Booster.  That Stereo could be CRANKED UP.  Very cool in 1978.  We chatted a few minutes but then she had to leave because she had to get home to have CHRISTMAS DINNER.  This was at 10:30 at night on 12/26!! – Her excuse was “My father is a Sergent for the  airport police and he had to work Christmas and won’t be home tonight until 11:00”. 

It turns out, that was true but not the real reason Christmas Dinner was being served a day late and at 11:00 at night. 

 It would take a while for the REAL story to come to light.  

TO BE CONTINUED

You can follow me on Facebook at “I am Dazed and Confused” or Twitter – www.twitter.com/iamdandc

cs

¹ – Queerbait is used here as it was often in the 1970’s as a synonym for lame, stupid, boring or nerdy.  Not as the derogatory term for gays or effeminate men.  I am being 70’s style Politically Incorrect, not hateful. 

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3 Responses to “Christmas Came Late For My Wife’s Family”

  1. promajaneck Says:

    You used to work at Chess King? that is awesome!! did you get a discount on parachute pants?


    • I am INSULTED by this comment. I worked there in 1978! I got discounts on Gauze Shirts and Brittania Jeans!!!!

      I NEVER WORE PARACHUTE PANTS!!!

      I may be a little Dazed and Confused About That Though.

  2. David Says:

    You freaking crack me up sometimes..


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